Archive for June, 2011
Monday, June 27th, 2011
 Interestingly enough this topic has come up more than once in recent months. It has lead me to think others of you may be pondering these same issues . . .
Always leave both the toilet seat and cover down when you finish using the commode. This applies to both men and women, whether at home and in public facilities.
Never use the last sheet of bathroom tissue without informing the host. Better yet, a host should leave extra rolls in plain sight for guests to access and replace when needed.
Remember to be respectful of a person’s home. Do not rummage around in cabinets for items you may want, such as aspirin. Instead, always ask the host to assist you.
Always flush. This should be common sense. Flushing is as much a priority as washing your hands. The wide use of toilet and urinal sensors has made the issue of flushing a moot point in most public bathrooms. If, however, the bathroom you’re using does not have a sensor, it’s up to you to flush immediately after you finish. The old rule of “if it’s yellow let it mellow, if it’s brown flush it down.” does not apply to public facilities. Urinals need to be flushed too—it will help keep foul odors at a minimum.
Flushing is just one part of keeping any bathroom tidy. Don’t forget to also pick up any toilet paper if it has fallen to the floor, remove any newspapers or reading materials that you’ve brought in, and clean up the toilet seat or rim if you’ve splattered. It’s important to treat a public or friend’s bathroom with even more care and respect than you treat your bathroom at home.
Don’t conduct business in an office or public bathroom. A public bathroom is not a cubicle with a toilet. Therefore, don’t use this very specific space to conduct business, make phone calls, or send e-mails.
Wash your hands! This should be self explanatory. Germs are spread through contact. Washing your hands not only helps disinfect the germs that were on you before you went into the bathroom, but makes sure you walk out with fewer germs on your hands than when you walked in.
Sink usage. If you are going to use the sink do not make a mess. Do not be splash water all over. And, if you: shave, comb, brush, or cut your hair around the sink take the time to clean up after yourself.
Stall and urinal choices. You should always chose the toilet stall or urinal which gives both you and other people in the bathroom the most “buffer room”—the one on the end. If there is only one stall or urinal left—wait—No one wants to feel crowded.
Use the trash recepticles. Put your used paper towels and any other trash in a recepticle, never just toss it on the floor or in the general direction of the recepticle as your’re leaving.
BONUS TIP: When placing a new roll of bathroom tissue in its holder, the tissues are to be unrolled from over the top, so the end hangs in front of the roll, not behind. Of course, if you have a cat or a child that unrolls the toilet paper onto the floor or into the toilet bowl, that’s different—you may let the end hang behind the roll.
QUESTION: WHAT OTHER ITEMS DO YOU HAVE TO ADD TO THIS LIST? Do let us hear from you in the area below. You may also reach us at www.AdvancedEtiquette.com. If you enjoyed this article and want more, subscribe to our “Etiquette Tip of the Month” newsletter—at no charge—filled with great monthly tips on all sorts of topics from international business and social etiquette and protocol to everyday life subjects. It will be great to have you as a member of our happy family of subscribers at www.AdvancedEtiquette.com/subscribe.
Happy Practicing!
Tags: bathroom courtesies, bathroom etiquette, bathroom manners, toilet paper manners, toilet seat manners
Posted in Life | 4 Comments »
Thursday, June 23rd, 2011
 With Spring in full bloom and a number of special events upon us—graduations, Father’s Day, weddings, job promotions, retirements, and the like—here are a few tips on how to give and receive a toast..
TOAST-GIVER
Always take time to prepare and write down your toast. Make it fun, brief, and simple. When describing an honoree, speak from the heart sharing a fun and amusing story in your own words, for no longer than one minute. Conclude by inviting everyone to raise their glass and join you in a toast to the honoree.
Never use a piece of flatware and a glass as your way of getting people’s attention. Rather, alert key people in the room ahead of time to help you get their table and area quiet when the time arrives. Say, in a loud projecting voice, “May I have your attention please.” Repeat as needed, continuing to look around the room to get everyone’s attention.
Remember to make good eye contact with the honoree by raising your glass to shoulder height in front of you, and gesturing toward the honoree and others around you, stating, “Cheers!, Here’s to you (and/or his/her name).”
TOAST-RECEIVER
As the honoree:
Always remain seated through the entire toast being proposed to you.
Never raise your glass along with the others when you are being toasted and honored. This makes it appear you are toasting yourself.
Remember you should return a toast of thanks immediately following the one you were given. Whether the toast-giver stood during his/her remarks or remained seated, you must do the same. Do thank the host for hosting the event in your honor; do say a few words about the event for no more than one minute; then conclude by inviting one and all to join you in another round of toasting, by saying, “and thank you one and all for being here.”
Now have fun viewing this You-Tube video on Toasting Etiquette, also at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRoHpPVrUQk. Some times it’s easier to watch and learn than to read.
Bonus Tip: The clinking of glasses is a popular and fun activity. Nevertheless, when toasting an honoree it is not performed. Simply raise your glass to shoulder height in front of you, make good eye contact with the honoree and others, and gently gesture toward the honoree.
Question: What other items do you have to add to this list? Do let us hear from you at www.AdvancedEtiquette.com . If you enjoyed this article and want more, subscribe to our “Etiquette Tip of the Month” newsletter—at no charge—filled with great monthly tips on all sorts of topics from international business and social etiquette and protocol to everyday life subjects. It will be great to have you as a member of our happy family of subscribers at www.AdvancedEtiquette.com/subscribe.
Happy Toasting!
Tags: giving toasts, receiving toasts, toasting etiquette, toasting practices, toasts
Posted in Life | No Comments »
Friday, June 17th, 2011
 Summer is the most popular vacation season. For many people, a vacation includes spending treasured time visiting friends and relatives around the country and around the world. Employ these simple tips to be an outstanding houseguest and ensure both you and your hosts will enjoy your visit and they will want you back again someday:
1. Bring a “hostess” gift: Even when staying just one night, always present your host with a house gift shortly after your arrival. Good gift ideas include attractively wrapped kitchen tools, a book, candles, a collectible your host will treasure, and specialty food and wine you know they will enjoy. The main criteria should be that it be something your host will appreciate.
2. Make yourself useful: Offer to help with meal preparation, doing dishes and other chores as though you were a member of the household. Do not expect your hosts to wait on you hand and foot throughout your stay. A nice gesture during an extended stay is to treat your hosts to dinner at a nice restaurant or cook them dinner at home one evening.
3. Be flexible about foods and eating times: Except for medical and religious restrictions, avoid dictating meal times and what your hosts serve. If you do have food restrictions, let your hosts know with a simple note prior to your arrival. If you have special food or beverage needs, bring these items with you.
4. Keep your space tidy: Make your bed each day, keep your belongings put away and leave the room or sleeping area in neat order at all times. Because guest spaces are often used by the family for other purposes, leave your door ajar when not in the room, so your hosts know you’re not there and can access the room when necessary.
5. Be diligent in the bathroom: Never leave the bathroom in a mess. Wipe the sink and shower, neatly hang your towels and close the lid on the commode after each use. Review other tips on our blog, especially the “Etiquette Tip of the Month” on Bathroom Etiquette.
6. Ask permission: If you want to use an item in the house, ask if its OK. Leave money for any telephone and other charges (including utilities) you may have incurred during your stay. Be sensitive to whatever guidelines your hosts may have for the use of all items in their home.
7. Share your schedule: While you cannot expect your hosts to entertain you throughout your visit, a good host will feel a sense of responsibility for your well-being, and want to know when to expect you in their home. Provide your hosts your general daily itinerary—primarily when you may be expected to leave and return each day. Carry your host’s home and business address and telephone numbers with you to keep in touch if you will be delayed or in case of emergency. If you have a cell phone, leave the number with your hosts too.
8. Be grateful: And let your hosts know you are. Write a thank you note to your host upon your return home. Reciprocate in-kind whenever possible, by offering to host your hosts for a visit. When you make yourself an outstanding guest, you may often hear, “mi casa es su casa,” my house is your house.
MOST IMPORTANTLY: Leave the space ready for the next guest. The day you leave, strip the bed, place all soiled linens and towels neatly in a pillow case and set the case near the laundry facilities. Re-cover the bed with the bedspread so it will look fresh until the next guest arrives. Finally, check the space to be sure you haven’t left any personal items behind.
What other tips do you have to add to this list? Let us hear from you by entering your comments below. You may also reach us at www.AdvancedEtiquette.com. If you enjoyed this article and want more, subscribe to our “Etiquette Tip of the Month” newsletter—at no charge—filled with great monthly tips on all sorts of topics from international business and social etiquette and protocol to everyday life subjects. It will be great to have you as a member of our happy family of subscribers at www.AdvancedEtiquette.com/subscribe
Happy Practicing!
Tags: guest etiquette, house guest, staying over
Posted in Life | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, June 1st, 2011
 Do you have one or more words or phrases you can’t stand? I do. Among them is the word “further” instead of “farther” when talking about distance. Another is common on signs in stores, saying “10 items or less” when it should read, “10 items or fewer.”
But my Number One worst pet peeve is how people constantly use “No problem” as the response to almost everything. It’s become a so trite, clichéd, unoriginal, and commonplace.
I knew I reached a boiling point when I saw this quote by the British author P.G. Woodhouse: “A slight throbbing about the temples told me that this discussion had reached saturation point.” Not only do my temples throb, but my brain screeches every time I hear those two words. And sadly, I hear them all too often. Cashiers say “No problem” after I thank them for the change I receive for my purchase. Waiters say “No problem” when giving me change from the bill I just paid. Front desk attendants say “No problem” after I thank them for giving me my room key.
What was the problem in the first place? What happened to the simple yet powerful phrases of “You’re welcome” and perhaps “My pleasure?”
It’s not just people in the service field who say it. I recently heard it out the mouth of a 6-year-old boy, and worst of all I’ve caught myself saying it. (By the way, if you ever hear me saying “No problem” please feel free to call my attention to it, if I didn’t already do it first.)
In many other languages, the customary reply to “Thank you” is not always a literal translation of “You’re welcome.” In French, for instance, the reply is “De rien,” which means, “It was nothing.” In Spanish, a common response is “De nada,” which means, “It was nothing” as well. In the U.S., Americans even use the slang “No problemo,” a bastardization of the more correct Spanish phrase, “No hay problema,” or “Ningún problema.” Is that where we get it? The more we hear and see the term used – even in movies — the more correct we think it is.
No matter how you slice it, in American English, to use the phrase “No problem” as the correct response to “thank you” and most other situations is not accurate. In fact, it’s inappropriate, in most instances inaccurate and in some instances rude. The correct response… one more time is “You’re welcome,” or “It’s my pleasure.”
Help Me Stamp out “No Problem”
I’m declaring a personal crusade to stamp out the use of “No problem” in our society. Henceforth, this subject will be a standard item in all my seminars and presentations, as are a few other topics, such as writing thank you notes. If you agree, please join me in a crusade to stamp it out. Here’s all you need to do:
1. Post a comment in the area below to show support of my efforts. I’d love to know I’m not alone.
2. Share your own stories about situations you’ve encountered where you heard the words “No problem” in lieu of what you think would have been a better choice of words.
3. Submit your own commitment to making every effort to eliminate these words from your writing and speech.
4. For parents and teachers: Educate and encourage your children and students on the merits of not using these words.
5. As an employer, share this article as something for your staff members to not use in front of your clients and customers.
If we all reduce the use of these words in lieu of other more appropriate words, over time it will become less and less common and appropriate to say. This is exactly how etiquette comes into effect.
Together we may be able to make a positive change in our society.
Happy Practicing!
Tags: no problem, saying no problem
Posted in Life | 62 Comments »
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