For years I’ve been talking about an Etiquette Intelligence Quotient, which include the behaviors we display in specific situations. Now I’ve been learning more about another important EIQ… your Emotional Intelligence Quotient. This EIQ is the ability to manage our relationships and ourselves effectively. I’ve come to realize both these EIQs (EI²) truly go hand-in-hand as top components to the success of any company, organization, and individual. Here are a few thoughts to consider:

1. Fifty years ago we lived is a world with little diversity. People remained within their own borders to live and work among generations of the same ancestries and heritages. Today, people are traveling to live and work in countries around the world. Because we will evermore live in a world of great diversity, many new skills are a must to know and display to live a happy, healthy, and peaceful life. Skills such as being able to anticipate and sense how a person will react if your actions and words are conveyed a certain way.

2. Etiquette then is all about how you make a person feel that will either build or tear down that relationship, over time. EI² is therefore among the most crucial components to a successful life, whether at work, at home, or out in the community.

3. Whether you are a leader of yourself or of others, the successful leader must possess EI² in order to truly achieve a happy, healthy, and successful life.

4. If everyone could possess EI²:
• There would be greater efficiency in resolving potentially harmful matters. • People would be respected and trusted. No one would fly off the handle.
• People would feel secure in their roles at work, at home, and in their community. As a result, they would be eager to do more for themselves, the family, their jobs, and the community. They would contribute more and be more collaborative.
• Because everyone would be on the same page with how they are expected to behave, it would lead to fewer arguments and disappointments. This means there would be fewer unhappy situations that can often lead to poor health, loss of productivity, loss of employees (meaning having to rehire and retrain new staff) and rebuilding comradary among the staff. All these situations affect the bottom line in business and personal success.

5. Here a few tips on how to achieve EI²:
• Starting today, learn as much as you can about emotional and etiquette intelligence. Attached are the first two reports I read on emotional intelligence, both from the Harvard Business Review. They will give you a good overview of this vast subject. Leadership that gets results… Building Emotional Intelligence of Groups
• Become forever conscious of how your behavior affects others. Constantly ask yourself: Did my words and actions enhance my relationship with that person?
• Be a model of the change you want to see in others. Show you are a team player who always displays a cooperative and collaborative spirit.
• At work, develop a Code of Conduct with others and have each person agree to uphold this code. Have people agree to post the code someplace visible at their work station to review each day, until it becomes a part of their everyday style of living.
• Hold periodic checks with those involved and perhaps designate a group leader to organize brief chats to confirm being on track or getting everyone back on course.

This is especially important during the first 6-12 months of building these new good habits, including discussions how everyone should handle certain situations with clients and among each other when they arise. Train and coach new people on what’s expected as a part of any new hire orientation. Look for more info on this important topic to come.

In the meantime, I’d love to hear your comments and experiences on how you have applied EI² in situations you’ve encountered personally and professionally.

Happy Practicing!